I’m just going to jump in and explain my lack of blogging yesterday when I get there 🙂 . Sunday was a lot of fun. For someone who is majoring in music and playing an orchestral instrument, I haven’t seen nearly enough live orchestras. I quite honestly think that the Pittsburg Symphony Orchestra was my second actual time seeing an orchestra live…and they were definitely way better than the one I remember. The hall in Pittsburg is absolutely GORGEOUS. They played beautifully as well…though I do think I have to admit there was a point where I maybe was falling asleep… it was just so beautiful. They played all of Holst’s Planets as well, which was my first time hearing all of them live and it was really really good. We went out to eat afterwards and as always, I had a good time with everyone.
Now at the concert Sunday night, I heard from my pianist that they caught covid and wouldn’t be able to do my hearing Monday. So I did have to reschedule that for next week. So I don’t have an update on my recital hearing, as it didn’t happen. I did a ton of playing yesterday still. I practiced, then had a band rehearsal where I played piccolo for 2 hours, then a flute lesson and then another flute player and I decided last minute to get together and work on our choreography for our performance at FSW this weekend. It was a ton of playing and I came home exhausted and basically didn’t realize I forgot to blog until I was in bed about to fall asleep. My lesson was honestly uncomfortable, but I knew it would be working on moving in Tuberama. There was a lot of intense moving and I either pulled something or am just still super duper sore from it….I definitely don’t work out enough.
Today felt just as chaotic. I woke up earlier than normal so I could get into the flute studio and record some things for social media then went to class. The class is getting really cool and we’re currently learning about how to create samples, which basically is live audio turned into midi that you can then play and mess with. After class I went to go practice for a while. Then I was supposed to observe someone’s lesson, but in a turn of events and me knocking a few times to not be let in it didn’t happen and I totally wasn’t super anxious about it. Any-who, eventually it was time for studio class where I played Revamper with a flute player to work on our choreo, then we went through more choreo for our studio piece. It was a bit rough since I’m so sore, but whatever. I was also super tired today when I got home, so I took a nap and now am finally blogging. I did get to wear the overalls I just bought today though!
As for mental health and practicing, things have been a bit rough this week. I’ve found myself being really irritable when I’m playing flute especially. It just feels like anything and everything is getting on my nerves, again, especially when playing flute. I don’t know what it is. I started playing flute because it was fun and I don’t like the fact that I’m getting so annoyed when playing it. I don’t even know what is making me so annoyed when I’m playing. I’m okay in practice, but as soon as it’s not just me, I get irritated. I’ve also just been really anxious lately and depression is still lingering as always. Today I definitely felt a dip in my motivation to practice towards the end of my practice session. I’m tired. I’ve been playing the same music for a while and feel like I need a change of pace. But honestly, I just want to have fun playing flute again. Now feeling peeved or frustrated when I play. Maybe that means it’s time for a break, or maybe I just need to suck it up and keep going. Maybe going to FSW will help with that. Hopefully.
Tomorrow is only Wednesday…it feels like it’s already been an entire week lol. But I’ll have classes and things as normal, another rehearsal with a flute player, and band. Thursday will also be pretty normal, though my dad is coming into town so he can watch my dog while I’m gone at FSW. I’m thinking I’ll try to blog Thursday as well and then on Monday when I get back from FSW and write all about it.