These past two days haven’t been so bad actually. Yesterday’s highlights are first me doing an assignment for my electronic music class and then my performance in studio class. For electronic music, the assignment was to just get used to all of the equipment and record something with the mics. I definitely got carried away and did not just record random sounds, but made a little tune. It was fun though, I’m really enjoying the class, though I haven’t done any real composing in a bit.
Then there was studio class where I performed Tuberama for the first time, from memory. Overall, I think it was good for a first performance. Memory-wise was actually really good, there were a few moments that I knew I didn’t play correctly, but I stayed on the beat and at least what I played happened again in the piece since there’s a lot of repetition. I started and ended with the track though. Now movement-wise it wasn’t very good. Which I figured would happen. When I’m practicing and alone, I am totally fine moving and dancing to the music…then I go to play in front of people and I freeze. Which isn’t that unusual for me, it’s something that really really frustrates me, but at least this time the freeze wasn’t with my actual flute sound if that makes sense? Like it used to be that I would play completely different in practice than performance and I’d be frustrated because I knew I could play it better. That part is okay now, but movement is not. I move a lot when I’m alone, but then freeze up. So my next step will be a matter of quite literally, moving through the “cold”. I don’t know what it is, but when I’m in front of people I just can not dance it makes me so uncomfortable, especially if it’s not choreographed. So I think I’ve convinced my sister to choreograph the “dance breaks” for me which will hopefully help, though it will mean I’m really dancing in front of people. Scary. I’ll have to find some way of loosening up even more around people.
My night yesterday was basically spent doing various school work related things. Not procrastinating assignments (mostly) and getting things together. Today getting up was somewhat difficult, so the deal I made with myself was to practice after band to make up for not getting to the music building earlier to practice. But my first practice session was good, I was definitely thinking a lot which I think is a good thing. I’m caring more about how pieces sound and getting more picky, but not so picky that I think I suck…usually. Then band rehearsal was fine, though I cannot get through a rehearsal without ear plugs anymore. That’s probably a good thing though in the long run. Then I did go and practice after band a bit, mostly focusing on recording some things for social media. That’s what I’ve basically been doing since getting back, lots of editing and scheduling things to post. There should hopefully be some cool things getting posted from me, well, I think they’re cool.
I am starting to feel like dip in motivation with practicing, so I do think I’m going to do as suggested and not practice tomorrow in order to recharge and hopefully get work done Friday and Saturday. Overall though, my mood has improved a lot since I last posted. I honestly think it could just be because I keep myself busier during the week because I have things to do for school, so I just simply don’t have time to think too much which is making my mood better. But I know if I continue to stay busy, I’ll eventually snap because I’m stressed, so I’m trying to keep a better balance. So this weekend, I think definitely practicing Saturday may actually help my mood rather than make me stressed. I also need to start getting back into yoga, as I hold a lot of my stress in my body and stretching just relaxes me.
And that’s where I’ll end today’s post. Tomorrow I don’t think I have anything too interesting going on, but Friday is our first Wind Symphony concert which should be fun!
by juniparker
